A continuation of the series A tie that binds.

I don't remember my mom ever saying to me, "you get that trait from your father," or "your father used to do that."

As a mother, I find myself having those thoughts all the time.  As I watch my children learn and grow I see both my husband's and my traits in them, constantly. 

Did she never say anything to me so as not to remind me that he wasn't around? 

I can't pretend to understand her situation.  I can't imagine that being a single mother was easy for her.  However, having lived with her personally, I also know she was not an easy person to live with.  I wonder what their break-up was like.  I wonder how they met. 

Since our first encounter I now know my father's birth date.  He was not much older than my mother.  Perhaps they met in school or at work.  Or even on the bus.  I hope to know the answers to these questions soon.

I've yet to tell my kids that they have a grandfather in a foreign country who only speaks Spanish.  It has nothing to do with how to do the explaining but more with the fact that I'm simply not ready to offer explicit details to anyone who will ask too many questions.  I"m still processing it all myself. 

To be continued...